Sunday, December 29, 2013

The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug Review

Happy Holidays!  It's Santa Guaps coming at you with a sleigh full of goodies.  But I ain't bringing you toys and shit, I'm bringing my thought.  (Waaay better than toys.)  About a year ago I saw The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey and wrote a review on it.  I figured why not do it again for the second installment of the series.  And like last year I'm writing this review late so I'm sticking with traditions.  So let's check out how this movie compared to the last and end 2013 right for Infinite Wisdom From El Guapo's Brain.

I'll kick this off by first saying Peter Jackson is amazing.  The dude knows how to direct the shit out of a movie and make that look beautiful.  Just look at his track record.  The dude was built for this directing shit.  He could film me taking a shit and turn that footage into fucking art.  (Probably could content for a Golden Globe.)  So once again his sprinkles his magic into this film.  This was easily more interesting than the first but that's only because the first was setting all the pieces together.  This movie had all the action AND we got to see Smaug the dragon.  The movie is also really inspiring.  In the two times I watched it I realized the Bilbo really does all the legwork but he doesn't get much respect and that's real.  Without Bilbo the crew of dwarfs would still be in the Shire, but they're not gonna praising him like they praise Thorin.  That applies directly in life.  Sometimes you'll be doing a lot of good work and you won't get credit or it and then somebody just strolls along and steals your thunder.  Sometimes you just got to live with that.  (The Guaps knows a thing or two about that.

We met some new characters this time around like the shape-shifter guy and the elves, including hot she-elf  Tauriel and our old friend Legolas.  Now if you're wondering if Legolas was in the book the answer is no.  So if you're one of those purists who believe that movies should stick as close to the book as possible this might make you upset.  What made me upset is how Orlando Bloom decided to take a hiatus from acting and came back fat.  (Was I the only one who noticed Legolas gained a good 10 lbs?)  Orlando Bloom had a good streak a movies in the early 2000s and I'm guessing after he made The Three Musketeers he decided it was time to stop hitting the gym.  Anyways the elves were pretty dope in this movie.  Even if Legolas is not in the book, he and she-elf added another notch to this film.

This movie gets a Guapo.  It was a solid movie, better than the first, but nothing mind blowing.  I still recommend it though.  If you love great adventure movies with amazing cinematography then this is the film for you.  Now I can't wait for the last installment.  And with that I'll end my post.  Follow me on Twitter @ELGUAPO3 and Instagram @CAPTAINCRUNCHTIME.  You can also catch me on Tumblr at  Have a happy holiday season and look out for the Guaps in 2014.  Stay Guapo out there!


  1. was it just me or was this movie hella boring though? also the best part is that they got Sherlock and Watson from the show Sherlock to be Smaug and Bilbo

  2. I just want them to get the next installment over with, and be done with this whole unneeded trilogy. Seriously, that's all I want. Good review.